I love when this happen, that I get here and i really need to wirte a post 'cause the feeling that is taking over me is so big and strong that I just Have to write. I love it. Right now, yes I'm felling this way and you can tell because I'm writing in english, which only happens when I'm really into something, and it is this:
-> Today I discovered two things that won't change... at least in a few years... the thing is that I've been inlove with two boys (no, I'm not that kind of bitch, is not like I'm into two guys... no, it is NOT the same... if you know me well you will understand) and I just realized that this fact won't change even when I try my best to make it easy to be done...
This afternoon I was working, my last day of ESL in Carousel and I got a call... a call that made me feel happy...why? because it was a call that I wasn't expecting and it just happended... it wasn't something important it was just like a friendly call but in the moment that I hang up the cell I knew it: "I still love that guy"
Then I went out with my friend flo.. and we went to this techno party... and since the moment that I started dancing I realized that the music that the Dj was playing made me feel like I was 15 again... inlove for the first time, with you D. and I felt free like I could love anyone, anyone like you. Now that I'm sitting here on my computer writing this I know that you won't let me love you and it makes me feel sad, frustrated, lonely and mad. But well, I don't think I need to keep telling everybody how I feel about us even though there's no us.
And well... like i said before: life goes on and there are lots of changes that are suppose to come for everyone, I guess I'll just wait and wait for those changes to happen cause honestly it feels empty here.
P.S.: Hon... honestly is sad what's happening to us but I can tell you this, it wasn't my fault at all. Is just that I cannot be with someone that doesn't know how to express and unfortunately that guy is you, even when I love you and that won't change.. I need you to stop, let me out of your cofusion 'cause I got out a long time ago. And if you think I'm wrong.. well forget about this... maybe I'm the one playing with someone else's mind uh?
P.S.2.: Felicidades Patty, people like you always get those opportunities :)
I awake to find no peace of mind,
I said, how do you live as a fugitive?
Down here where I cannot see so clear.
I said, what do I know?
Show me the right way to go,
And the spies came out of the water,
But you’re feeling so bad cos you know,
And the spies hide out in every corner,
But you can’t touch them no,
Cos they’re all spies, they’re all spies.
I awake to see that no one is free,
We’re all fugitives,
Look at the way we live.
Down here, I cannot sleep from fear no.
I said, which way do I turn?
I forget everything I learn,
But the spies came out of the water,
But you’re feeling so bad cos you know,
And the spies hide out in every corner,
But you can’t touch them though,
Cos they’re all spies, they’re all spies.
And if we don’t hide here,
They’re going to find us,
If we don’t hide now,
They’re going to catch us where we sleep,
And if we don’t hide here,
They’re going to find us.
I said, how do you live as a fugitive?
Down here where I cannot see so clear.
I said, what do I know?
Show me the right way to go,
And the spies came out of the water,
But you’re feeling so bad cos you know,
And the spies hide out in every corner,
But you can’t touch them no,
Cos they’re all spies, they’re all spies.
I awake to see that no one is free,
We’re all fugitives,
Look at the way we live.
Down here, I cannot sleep from fear no.
I said, which way do I turn?
I forget everything I learn,
But the spies came out of the water,
But you’re feeling so bad cos you know,
And the spies hide out in every corner,
But you can’t touch them though,
Cos they’re all spies, they’re all spies.
And if we don’t hide here,
They’re going to find us,
If we don’t hide now,
They’re going to catch us where we sleep,
And if we don’t hide here,
They’re going to find us.
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