Vain

4 voices


Desconocido no es que mis escritos no sólo son reflejo de mi, sino de otras personas y experiencias que esas otras personas me han proporcionado. De allí viene todo el asunto de mis perspectivas compartidas.

Lo cómico resulta ser que me he dado cuenta lo vanidoso del asunto, digo (he estado en la posición, por lo tanto se de lo que hablo) el saber que una persona escribió sobre uno otorga una sensación bastante grata, es agradable, cierto? Y probablemente muchos se deben haber sentido de esta forma aqui dentro de mi caja, aún cuando muy pocas veces ha sido claro el personaje involucrado en el post.

No lo niego, algunas veces pueden percibirlo, pero estoy segura que se han equivocado en otras oportunidades... Al final (sin pretender sonar vanidosa yo) es mucho lo que hay que desconfigurar en mi cabeza para realmente comprender o desencriptar algunos de mis post, especialmente cuando van dirigidos a ciertos "someones"; si la idea es ser yo la única que sepa... quién cree que pueda adivinarlo? Tan gafa no soy creo, si deseo que lo sepas... lo sabrás sin duda alguna.

La idea de escribir sobre seres que me rodean viene de eso que dije al principio, perspectivas y experiencias que me robo y que vivo con ellos, que van construyendo poco a poco lo que soy. Siempre envío mensajes pero de una forma muy propia y si se quiere, cobarde... Cuantos post he dedicado directamente? Son contados y giran en distintos planos. Algunos han comenzado a conocer y traducir mis escritos, pues bien por ellos a veces.

Así que tú, tú, tú y quizás tú... quizás esto es sobre ti, quizás no lo es. Tuve por un momento la sensación de restricción al escribir y fue por eso, porque apuesto a que piensas que tendrá que ver contigo. Esa sensación estoy dejándola atrás mientras escribo esto, me niego a no soltar palabras aquí sólo porque pienses que te escribo directamente y te provoque darle X significado a Mis palabras. *Plural*Many*

Hehe.. por último, apenas pensé en escribir esto, una solita canción se me vino a la cabeza... más perfecta imposible.

Lyrics by Carly Simon

You walked into the party
Like you were walking onto a yacht
Your hat strategically dipped below one eye
Your scarf it was apricot
You had one eye in the mirror
As you watched yourself gavotte
And all the girls dreamed that they'd be your partner
They'd be your partner, and

You're so vain
You probably think this song is about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think this song is about you
Don't you? Don't you?


You had me several years ago
When I was still quite naive
Well, you said that we made such a pretty pair
And that you would never leave
But you gave away the things you loved
And one of them was me
I had some dreams they were clouds in my coffee
Clouds in my coffee, and


You're so vain
You probably think this song is about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think this song is about you
Don't you? Don't you?


I had some dreams they were clouds in my coffee
Clouds in my coffee, and


You're so vain
You probably think this song is about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think this song is about you
Don't you? Don't you?


Well, I hear you went up to Saratoga
And your horse naturally won
Then you flew your Lear jet up to Nova Scotia
To see the total eclipse of the sun
Well, you're where you should be all the time
And when you're not, you're with
Some underworld spy or the wife of a close friend
Wife of a close friend, and


You're so vain
You probably think this song is about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think this song is about you
Don't you? Don't you?
Read On

Static

4 voices

Do you wonder a lot? Why is that some of the things I do, seem to be contradictory? Is it a weird perspective to make people think otherwise? I bet you do wonder, very often.

Do you think about my position? About what I could think of you, knowing that we don't really got to know each other? Is it just an idea of fantasy or maybe a dream you thought it could be?

Many different movements that make us pretend we know how to move these pieces, and ignoring the truth, we were crazy about each other... You came then left and came back to be gone for good and never really stood as an option for me to take, and now that it's not different, and your presence is as fake as it always was, what you provide makes me fall for your energy.

Do you wonder how people could love an invisible item? What if I had that answer? You would no fight for me. And since you were never my wall I assume to be an illusion in your space. 'Cause there's an energy that surrounds you and you can't tell where it came from... I make it fly from here.

Do you wonder about the music (U2)?
Do you wonder about the time (3:35 am)?
Do you wonder about our never real moment (back seat)?
Do you wonder about my rough position (in the stone)?
Do you know how to stop something that never even began (the sweet emotion)?

...There is no deal for you.

Lyrics by Maximo Park

Night falls and towns become circuit boards
We can beat the sun as long as we keep moving
From the air, stadium lights stand out like flares
And all I know is that you're sat here right next to me

We rarely see warning signs in the air we breathe
Right now I feel each and every fragment

This paper trail leads right back to you
You say you need me to step outside
You spent the evening unpacking books from boxes
You passed me up so as not to break a promise
Scattered polaroids and sprinkled words around your collar in the long run
Said you knew that this would happen

Well this is something new but it turns out it was borrowed too
Why does every let down have to be so thin?
Rain explodes at the moment that the cab door closed
I feel the weight upon your kiss ambiguous

You have to leave, I appreciate that
But I hate when conversation slips out of our grasp

You spent the evening unpacking books from boxes
You passed me up so as not to break a promise
Scattered polaroids and sprinkled words around your collar in the long run
Said you knew that this would happen

Two bodies in motion
This is a matter of fact
It wasn't built to last

Two bodies in motion
This is a matter of fact
It wasn't built to last

You spent the evening unpacking books from boxes
You passed me up so as not to break a promise
Scattered polaroids and sprinkled words around your collar in the long run
Said you knew that this would happen

The pounding rain continued it's bleak fall
And we decided just to write after all, after all
Read On

Sunday Feeling II

0 voices


I'll do my best not to make this such a depressive post.

A couple weeks ago, I started identifying certain sensation that made me feel like shit for no apparent reason and I would blame it on whatever was closer to me at the moment: too stressed out, too tired, lonely, etc... But none of those felt like the real reason, so I just tried not to think about it for a while... After all, that sensation only came on Sundays.

Yesterday, while looking at the selling, I tried looking for the cause of this unpleasant feeling. And what I found out made it even worst... On Sundays there's nothing I do constantly, meaning that sundays are always random, there's no activity nor routine to follow. I'm just like a bag of sand laying on my bed, listening to the same music, going in and out crappy internet stuff, and just being quiet. And the reason why I won't look for something to do on Sundays is because I do too much during the rest of the week, so I should rest on Sundays.

So, why am I not enjoying my resting time? Why do I feel so empty and anxious? I used to enjoy silence much more, and now it feels like I'm screaming inside and there's no sound coming out of me. Weird and wasted ideas come to my head and my mind is free to figure out whatever I don't allow myself to understand during my week days. But thankfully, Sundays only last 24 hours and my week always starts again...

If I could make Sundays last longer, in order to push myself to understand and figure out what' really happening... Then I might feel a little happier. Maybe I don't wanna see what's behind that big but not huge wall: after my routine there's nothing but a "sometimes filled" pocket and millions of ideas of things I'm too afraid to make happen.

.. As coward as always..

Lyrics by You Me At Six

You've seen me last night,
Working the room had their chests going tight,
I got a theory, all I need is one drink.

I've got you breathing all heavy and deep,
Gasping for air and down on your knees,
You're in love, but for as only as long as you're wanted.

You never miss a beat, but.

And you're the best kept secret, rolling off my tongue, some say you're
As easy as they come and I say, what a way for or the ice to break.
The best kept secret, rolling off my tongue, some say you're
As easy as they come and I say, what a way for or the ice to break.

Break down, you've always been so proud,
And just look at you now.
You're a bad smell in this room.
"And I don't wanna, I don't wanna be bad news."
"And I don't wanna, I don't wanna be bad news."
But you are, but you are.

I would walk through hell with a smile on my face.
Just so I could make my mark on the hottest place.

The best kept secret, rolling off my tongue, some say you're
As easy as they come and I say, what a way for the ice to break.

The best kept secret, rolling off my tongue, some say you're
As easy as they come and I say, what a way for the ice to break.

The best kept secret, rolling off my tongue, some say you're
As easy as they come and I say, what a way for the ice to break.

And you're the best kept secret, rolling off my tongue, some say you're
As easy as they come and I say, what a way for the ice to break.

The best kept secret, rolling off my tongue, some say you're
As easy as they come and I say, what a way for the ice to break.

(Background vocals)
Never miss a thing, noo.
Never miss a thing, noo.
Never miss a thing, noo.

What a way for the ice to break.
Read On

Five Drinks And a Season Of Surrendering (Buttons)

2 voices


People and the wonderful vision we all have of situations. Colors everywhere, movements and buttons… yes, buttons. Seeing those from a certain perspective (yep, mine), buttons are everywhere and there’re many as can be:


Start buttons:

Some might believe this, some just wont… and they should. We have the power to set things in motion. When we are sure and we trust in that power, the universe cooperates with our plan and we press the start button for situations to get created. Imagination? Heh, sure. Try it.


Pause buttons:

Once we got ourselves in this particular situation, there’re actions we might take to make things stop just for a while… you could do this to check if that place is where you really want to be, and what you’re doing is what really makes you happy. Just press pause once to analyze and press pause once more to keep on moving.


Forward buttons:

This very special button is hard to figure out and to use. It works to create possible events that might happen or not during your very unique and fun walk (yep, The situation). Some people don’t understand the magical power of this pretty button and might not give the proper use to it. It’s not easy to get conclusions from very personal ideas. But the button is there waiting to be pressed.


Rewind buttons:

One of the buttons people enjoy the most. But a button that can’t really maintain the sensations or feelings the person experiments during certain events. You go through this situation and after time passes by you press this button to live it again in your head, but with time the effect fades and it’s necessary to go find some other situations… or the way to recreate that one you enjoyed so much.


Slow motion buttons:

One of my favorites and only real if your imagination is as big as it can be. Situations could be so perfect, fun or right that time could be pushed aside for it is invisible and can’t control our motions. This button of magical power that can give us the great sensation of some high emotion, enjoying for longer that rush of events that got started.


Stop buttons:

Very effective if they’re used the correct way. People tend to use this button very often and they regret doing it after a short break of reality, it’s an emergency stop for those situations that might get out of control, got to big to handle, it has been wasted or as simple as “this is not making me happy anymore!!!!”. After this button is pressed the situation won’t ever come back as it was before.


Kind of cold to associate real living situations with this particular way of thinking (using these buttons) but when things are under control, your imagination can transform into whatever you want. And for me… this process has become in something so easy, amazing, magical and perfect that I just can’t help share it with you all.


Lyrics by Hey Mercedes

monday
this is what you're up against
your head rings to the rhythm of the alarm
clock time in breathe in time out breathe out
i doubt that this is what you're all about
tuesday
this is what you're up against

the television and your version of aversion
the car the candy and the shower curtain
blurting out the answers
you didn't even ask for
but it's bound to get better
it better
slow motion replay
day in day out
we came all this way now
we'll fire up just to push them down
hello
human, we've got a little problem here
us babies need to back up to the base or
do you want to fake it
kiss it just to taste it
a door in the face or
a face on the floor
well
tonight
this is what i'm up against
five drinks and a season of surrendering
come out come out we all give up
got too tough and enough is enough
wait i can see
our selves set free
the sound and the string and
you and me
slow motion replay
day in day out
we all came this way now
we'll fire up just to push them down
i can't wait to see you wait
wait i can see
our selves set free
the simmering sea and
you and me
Read On