See Saw

I would say it's a great concept to associate situations with, perfect because my idea fits just right and the experiences have told me so. Up, down not always in a perfect balance and not always as fun as we might think... For a reason I've noticed children seek for particular friends to play this game, and I'm sure there's no reason for me to explain it here, you all got it.

Both positions could be enjoyable or not, depending on what we want from the game. For a while I believed that being on top represented the highest position in certain situations (before you wonder, yes, I do believe there's always one on top and the other one on the bottom, when it comes to feelings and expectations). But five minutes ago the whole thing changed, when I saw control coming along.

On top of the see saw we don't control what happens, the rush is way more intense, we see from a different and wider point of view, more and more colors come and intensify what we feel and expectations run wild for the space given. But we don't control the time we're on top, because it depends on  the one that is holding down there, all power concentrates on the one below.
Down here we don't see much fantasy, realness seems to be given by how close we are from the ground. We must keep or feet well planted so the whole thing stays how it is, and expectations hang from the vision of the moment when we switch places, going to the top of the see saw. We control it, but the rush is just focused on how much strength we must provide to hold that other person on the top of this thing.

A balance requires determination, and for one part to want it as much as the other one. Same perspective, same level of vision, same effort, all feet on the ground, same energy, same rush... Not negative at all, because the more we share it and feel the strenght given, the more we commit to the game.
I've been on top most of the time, specially when my whole desire has been not ending up there, but then happens and as much as I know myself, I know how freaky it is not to have the control... and knowing that this person on the bottom might as well just drop it and leave it... All good games always end. But while I'm sitting there, no matter the perspective I have, I keep on repeating myself "I won't compromise this idea, I won't avoid being who I am, and acting the way I act just to seek the balance"

Over and over again, I find myself in a see saw trying to enjoy before this monster of thoughts after thoughts come along and start damaging the fun... Because my sickness is to believe that this monster is what causes the whole deal, just for a small frame of time when gray tones seem to expand... and even when I know that by the end of this post, a the white shade will come back and all these words will be worthless.

Believe or not... I do enjoy the not thinking, and I do like the simple plan.

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