Fraction Like forgeting there's a destiny to reach A place where I must arrive A road that requires my presence Lights that remind me there's a time that eats me alive For a fraction of time a smile protects me Like if the sun would dare just for an instance to freeze and stare Making this particular second eternal And becoming a perfect partner to me My head and fingers don't notice the sequence of blues going around this window I'm making time stop, just for a fraction of time ...and before it ends ...before my power releases the glory of stillness will keep me warm and will remind me of the expecting of nothing In the photo: Rosana Goerke
Solution For One Tiny Moment If I close me eyes this way If I press myself down to this ground If I let my hair cover any sign of life around Then the sound will vanish If I hold on to my feet If I get my muscles this tense and tight If I seal my lips like this Then your image will disappear If I cross my fingers If I arch my back this way If I wrinkle my mind as much as I can Then for just the time I can do all this... Noticed Maybe I wish I felt different about this, but there's always one truth within all in our mind states. I heard this song, and after certain amounts of re-plays an idea came to my head: Today I don't believe what the lyrics say, at least not tonight, I never know about tomorrow. There is a bunch of endings and beginnings in life, they all differ in many circunstancial points, and they happen with no control over time. I never know when moments like that can come and surprise me, or when they can do it again and just vanish. But they do, and in some more than in others I try to avoid the warning signs, just to test myself. The heart can never beat the same way with different people, I wish I believed in that true beating or the one that will make the other ones get smaller, or make me forget their sound within time... Maybe this perspective of mine will change in the future, maybe I hope for it, but for now I enjoy the fact that I don't... because it means that I've been able to assume some endings, just to explore these nice beginnings. I do believe in the sensations of what 'new' means... I do believe in the blindness by choice because the feeling and infatuation demands a smile for no reasonable reason... I do believe in the feeling after feeling, all kinds of good and bad sensations, because it means that the heart works, and I can always feel again. Lyrics by Mutemath It's easy to be broken In the strangest fashion You start a chain reaction When you look my way Something's pounding away And I wonder if I ever felt this before And all this time, oblivious to what you make so obvious I can't believe I never noticed my heart before And you are reaching Something that is beating I can't believe I never noticed my heart before Over and again Racing out of my skin I can't believe I never noticed my heart before At least it was never until I noticed you and your ways Capture what I've misplaced In the perfect fashion Just watch my heart's reaction This point of view is nothing that I'm used to, but I won't close my eyes 'Cause they're on to you And all this time, it was staring me blind I can't believe I never noticed my heart before And you are reaching Something that is beating I can't believe I never noticed my heart before Over and again Racing out of my skin I can't believe I never noticed my heart before At least it was never until I noticed you The only time I ever noticed my heart Was when I noticed you, yeah The only time I ever noticed my heart Was when I noticed you, yeah Parachute In a blink you were here, like if the sky had decided to be kind enough kind enough to open up and bring this energy to me Like if the air that brought you could easily take you away and even with you around, I didn't notice the breeze that surounded you back then, you were just around But then this air that once was good to me, took you away with or without your help I saw how you parachute flew away from my celling, away from me I look back and it seems so fast now when they ask about you my face tries hard to hide hide this emotion and the sadness of the lack of who you were In a blink you were here, like if the sky had dediced to be kind enough but not kind enough to let you stick for a little while not kind enough to show you how wrong it is for me that you're not here anymore. This song reminds me of it... is a short song as short as the time that took the sky to take you away again. Tease How good could it be? Are there rules for it? Do I like it better than the real deal? Is it fake? What's the point? Is it natural in me to do so? Do I hurt anyone with it? Is there a limit that I understand? All these questions come to my head... often Sometimes I answer them, sometimes I smile inside There are moments when I stop and then go on All I know is that as fun as it can get... They could hang me for it. * The teaser in the photo... Wal. *
When The Party Ends We clean up, see the room after the people leave Usually there's a lot to fix, arrange Pick up, move again The mind full of certain moments that came real during the night Memories that get shaped while organizing Things I wish I said Some others I wish I didn't do Drinking the last bottle of wine while the loud music bounces on the walls in this now empty space without you I don't wanna take off my clothes or remove my makeup... This idea of having you close just for the night ended too fast too quickly... After the party ends I'll just sit here look around with my glass of wine and think of another and new excuse to have you over. Around This 443 443 could be just a number, but this time it's the amount of entries I've written in this blog.. This blog that got created 5 years ago, with a bunch of undisciplined ideas and a lack of structure, but one that has become a mirror, sheild and weapon to me and all my decisions (not sure if that's a good thing or not yet)... Still hiding behind this name and this character. Reviewing sometimes the perspectives I own and take as mine, defining others and making an effort to adjust to the idea of deleting and erasing; I've written many words put together, with sounds that remind me of how mine these lines are, and touching other people with it. 443 sounds like a small number if I think about what I might be missing still, but when I think about the amount of times I've tried to reach a certain goal with each and every entry, then the number feels too big... I don't know if this is the right path, or if all my decisions have been the correct ones, but I'm sure about how it feels, the writing and the exposing of the soul, with all I've got and all that defines me, a colorfull mixed of truths and lies, all shared with the best of intentions. Happy Birthday Box. Photo by Luz Lyrics of a song that I'm digging, by Keane I didn't want to go Go back and look for you But it's a heartless drug I'm addicted to And when I drive that road And start to feel that chill I think I see your face Do you come here still? Those were the times and these were the places Your love was so good And now that I'm here, I suddenly find that I'm tumbling backwards I'm back to where I was before Dreaming of glory and your love And now I'm lying on your floor Crashed on the surface of your love The chemicals react And molecules collide The poison works its way Somewhere down inside When we were young I really believed Love would never leave us But time has a knack of pulling the rug out From underneath us And nothing matters anymore I'm still a victim of your love And now I'm banging on your door Tumbling backwards with your love Over and over in your love I know they're only ghosts And memories that I'm clutching at Maybe I'm reaching back For something I never had Still it seems so real to me These rock and threats That lead me back to you I'm back to where I was before
Tumbling backwards at your love And now I'm lying on your floor Crashed on the surface of your love and the other dreams we had Fractioned and frozen with your love You put a spell upon me there Never be broken in your love Nowhere to run to but your love Over and over in your love Unarmed If I could grab this sensations and hold on to them for all eternity, then our lives would be so different, maybe happier, maybe insane, but if I could make them last... If I just could. There's nothing between the world and my heart, at this point there's not much I can do, adjust, measure, avoid, protect, there's just a naked soul with vulnerable feelings exposed in this environment of falls and pain. Because if we could only feel the good things, then I wouldn't be so afraid. Behind me there's my history, side by side I walk with what I own, and in front only what faith will provide. There's nothing but who I am and what I feel... Because I know moments can't freeze and seconds of greatness will just last what they're supposed to. If I could move with all this ideas, grab the unknown future and hide it in my drawer, then I think this fear would get smaller, at least just a bit. But I will still walk towards that experience, leaving under my bed all my weapons of control, the ones I use to shape this situations... They will stay here, while I move forward. If I could grab this sensations and hold on to them for all eternity, then our lives would be so different, maybe happier, maybe insane, but if I could make them last... If I just could. In the photo: Ruth Lyrics by Metric Get hot, get too close to the flame Wild, open space Talk like an open book Sign me up Got no time to take a picture I'll remember someday all the chances we took We're so close to something better left unknown We're so close to something better left unknown I can feel it in my bones Gimme sympathy After all of this is gone Who'd you rather be? The Beatles or the Rolling Stones? Oh, seriously You're gonna make mistakes, you're young Come on, baby, play me something Like, "Here Comes the Sun" Come on, baby, play me something Like, "Here Comes the Sun" Don't go, stay with the all-unknown Stay away from the hooks All the chances we took We're so close to something better left unknown We're so close to something better left unknown I can feel it in my bones Gimme sympathy After all of this is gone Who'd you rather be? The Beatles or the Rolling Stones? Oh, seriously You're gonna make mistakes, you're young Come on, baby, play me something Like, "Here Comes the Sun" Don't Make A Move Breathing on our necks, the distance between our bodies is almost unexisting, and this warmth is going from skin to skin. What a beautiful state to be in... with you... with me. Our hands walk freely, embracing the joy of touching us.. because if right now I could frame this sensation to hold it every time, I would... I would. Without moving our lips, these mouths of ours are dying for a kiss, one full with emotions and hidden desires. But we don't talk we just stare at each other. Holding us, knowing that there's nothing besides our shared ideas... Sounds of a very silent music that join us in this special encounter. This could end soon, and when it does fading will just be our closer action, noticing how memories get installed in our brains, loosing contact with that real sensation. So please don't move... I just ask you to stay like this for a bit longer, don't whisper or breathe more than this, this perfection could last a bit more... a few minutes more... Don't make a move, not tonight. Repeating lyrics by Frou Frou Sunbeam stop tugging me
Pull that door shut quietly Darling what are you doing We don't have time for this Mmm dey mmm da mmm daaeeoo Mmm dey mmm da mmm daaeeoo Crazy well what are you then Give me an hour and i'll give your dream... Don't make a sound shh listen Keep your head down - we're not safe yet Don't make a sound and be good for me 'Cos i know they're waiting somewhere out here Leave it i won't go back We have to do it cos there's nothing left here Don't care what do they know I've seen it baby and i know it's real Showtime i knew they'd come Woah are we having fun or what yeah Don't make a sound shh listen Keep your head down - we're not safe yet Don't make a sound and be good for me 'Cos i know they're waiting somewhere out here I feel good all over I feel good all over I feel good all over Wear your inside out Should, but Don't There is always that person in our lives, that unique and kind soul that will provide so much energy and good vibes to our steps, that wise and external idea that with very specific languages, communicates with us to lead that advice on its way... Because we need it and we need them... Friends that should just tell us how wrong we are, but they don't.. instead they throw little pieces of bread on the road for us to find the right way; even when sometimes it takes more than one or three pieces. Friends that should support every single step we make, but they don't.. instead they give us that so well known look and bring out the reasonable side of every single situation, attitude, decision and thought. Friends that should figure things out before us, but they don't.. they let us hit ourselves with the ground as much as its necessary, just to justify how good friends they are. Knowing that sometimes helping out is just better. Friends that call themselves friends, we see them as friends and should quit the games, but they don't, the self and sick satistaction of watching us go around and around the same stone, hitting our toes and bleeding, just for the excuse of how good friends they are, again. Friends that should stick through every single situation, but they don't and they just make holes in the land, digging just to burry their truths and the excuses not to face us. Because we can all be so cowards, and we can all pretend so much. I'm not sure if I like them, if I feel they should act differently, if they are better friends the way they are... I don't know if what I need from a friend is that or completely the opposite, maybe that's exactly what it is... All I know is that I still have them, some friends I miss and the rest I color them as if I were a friend to myself. In the photo: Chan Marshall Lyrics to remember good times: Kids in Glass Houses Well you can bark all night
But you're never gonna bite So I don't care Because it's dark and light And their fighting for the right To choose your her Well you can swing your arms You cam work your charms But not on me You can scream and shout That your fires burning out So don't blow air Swimming in a sea that's never been this close to me, yeah You've got a lot to answer for I've got a couple of questions more Cause you know I'm right Most the time You can bear a cross You can tick a box It's just a square With your knuckles grazed It's the way you raise your families here A slicker for the sun and how the summer's got a gun, yeah You've got a lot to answer for I've got a couple of questions more Cause you know I'm right Most the time Burn the books that you've adorned With words you stole from fools before you And those words they write Aint too bright And those words you write keep me up all night All night You've got a lot to answer for I've got a couple of questions more Cause you know I'm right Most the time
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