Sit Here And Feel This

It's pretty selfish to think about this, what I'm thinking right now... but I guess I can't really help it... and what's worst is that it's just an excuse to bitch for a while about stuff in my life.

I'm feeling through other people, people near me and I can't help thinking about what the universe has brought to my life and how clear things have been. Some situations came just because others came out that way, meaning that everything is just the result of other situations... the universe and the weird way it works.

But even when I'm a truly believer, I stand here tonight complaining about it. I give myself the liberty to say that if things were suppose to happen in a certain way, they should have... and I base my position in the consecuences that came after that "not happening" deal. For two years I've lived so many different things that although I enjoyed them all, tonight I wish they never really happened.

If the universe wouldn't have change our positions and our perspectives, things would be so different, and even though I know this way is better for me, and there was no chance I would be happy following that old road... I know that at least I wouldn't be suffering all these other and new situations... Maybe it's just easier to wish it wasn't real.

After you left, other feelings and sensations came to me and I wasn't ready to experiment that... I blame you for it, and for all that I've had lived this time... I wasn't ready and tonight I wish things were different, knowing that this position is as coward as possible. But I don't care, because of you and your decisions, I'm facing hard times and the fact that I'm feeling things that I shouldn't be feeling.

Things were suppose to go in one direction, and since you and the universe put me in this other hall, I can't help but bitching about it... I hate the falling in love process and I hate the fact that I have to go through that all over again. It's not fair.

I guess that it comes down to 20 min, and after all these words are written I'll go back to my crappy situation where my emotions and feelings need to fight against my reality just because it's not you anymore. As much as a student hates presenting themselves to the rest of the class, I hate that I'm not in that room with you anymore and I have to deal with all this new stuff...

Photo by: Vivian Alvarez
Lyrics by Trapt

You don't ever ask me why
you don't read the signs
you give me way too many reasons
for me to wanna get high

Standing tall between my four walls
and I'm about to fall
so look into me eyes and i say it all

I am lost, I am lost
so crucify me on your cross
whats the cost, whats the cost
to erase what I've been taught
Get off my back dont attack
So what if I fell off the tracks
your master plan, don't understand

I'd rather live in my own Wasteland
I'm already gonne
I'm already gonne
My own wasteland
I don't belong
I don't belong
My own wasteland

Scream at me until I shut down
Don't hear a sound
can only take so many cheap shots
down on the ground

I gotta go my own way this time
leave you behind
said it all but not enough for your
simple mind



You tell me what you want from me
you never ask me what i need
just let me go just set me free
and turn these nightmares into dreams


I'd rather live in my own Wasteland
And I wont waste another day
it doesn't matter what we say (my own wasteland)
your memories age
and with new age
I'd rather die in my own Wasteland

I'm already gonne
I'm already gonne
My own wasteland
I don't belong
I don't belong
My own wasteland
I'm already gonne
I'm already gonne
My own wasteland
I don't belong
I don't belong
My own wasteland

2 voices:

  • Anonymous said...

    No se de q va el problema de fondo..y quizas menos aun tenga derecho a opinar pero mas sabe el diablo x viejo, q x diablo y lamentable o afortunadamente, aqui la vieja soy yo ;)

    Para lo q fuera, si estabas lista...y si va a ser lo mejor y si lo vas a entender...

    it's just easier to wish it wasn't es verdad eso es todo, pero lo mas facil nunca es lo mejor preciosa, y las fighter girls like us lo sabemos x experienncia...

    I'm feeling things that I shouldn't be feeling...esto nunca pasa, si esta alli es x algo...aunq t tome mucho tiempo saber xq...estas creciendo, t esta preparando para lo estas sintiendo es x q asi deberia ser de esa manera y en este moento...dios, el destino, la vida, la energia,la causalidad.. en lo q sea q tu se equivoca...

    Things were suppose to go in one direction...y van en la direccion en q se supone q deben ir, t lo aseguro...en eso no hay pele aunq x ratos no parezca...

    yo se q a veces t cansas y piensas y no entiendes y no sabes, x q tu eres la q tienes q ser siempre la logica la fuerte la q se tiene q creer toda la bullshit de todo pasa x algo...pero es x q es asi jaja...

    Aunq no t conozca mucho disculpa lo atrevida pero solo quiero aportar algo a lo q siempre tu aportas con tus escritos...

    la vida es muy rara pero al final tene sentido...y se q lo sabes, en el fondo ya solo x la 1a frase, se ve q lo sabes.. solo q a veces uno se cansa de ser tan razonable o tan apropiado...y hace falta q alguien t lo recuerde y t diga yo me he sentido igual o parecido...

    Pero tranquila pasa..todo pasa...y nada velve a ser como no versiones mejoradas de ti..aunq parezca imposible...

    Como me dijo una amiga mia una vez y nunca lo olvidare:

    "Vas x buen camino Ami, solo q aun no te has dado cuenta..." ;)

    Un abrazo niña...

    PD. T felicito y t admiro x tener el coraje de compartir tus pensamientos con todos..y poderlos expresar con claridad para q no nos perdamos en el camino...

    Sylvia Ll. (t segui desde FB )

  • you made my day with this comment girl :)
    thanks for stopping by!

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