Sailing
I was standing on the dock staring at your indifference, just becoming aware of each second that passed by and I hesitated more.
I stood there understanding that any decision I made would not be real, because the ocean and wind were telling me this was a dream.
I couldn't figure out why my feet were still frozen and motionless, but you didn't say much to get me out of that state of numbness, I believe you were waiting for me to walk away.
The truth is you didn't know what I knew, for you it was another ride, another opportunity to float away, but for me it felt like a golden moment to share some time with you, because my mind new it would end, and I would wake up.
So I moved, and I got on the boat, laughing at the silliness of the whole deal: you riding a ridiculous and enormous boat, an old lady in a fancy state room, and waiting for his crew to take her to a fancy island. This is when I found out you were on a work mission, and I was just providing company.
Still we never saw her, stepping out of her kingdom, and you took the time to teach me how to hear the ocean, how to understand what the nights mean when you're away from land, gazing at the beauty of it all is something that I could not describe with words.
My notion of reality was too loud, and knowing that I was dreaming and that I would wake up at any moment made me stare at your smile for hours; remembering your sleeping pattern and the short time when I knew you.
Hours went by with a continuous alarm in my head but also tasting every moment of your presence. Because the second I woke up, laughing at the irony of this, I knew that one single encounter, had made me miss you all this time.
That smile in from of that bar will always remain as the most honest smiles I've given. Because in the past I've asked for the smile back, but in your case, it'll always belong to you.
But I am hell bound Many would tell you that my head spins around reasons, excuses and answers to questions that arise as we start getting closer, you seem to be nearby and my mind just reacts. I'm not sure still what it is that attracts me to you but as long as I don't put my finger on it, things won't stop bouncing... and unfortunately, that means you might feel I'm being evasive. And I am, very much. Because, being around you makes me miss them too much, and that sets an alarm in my heart. You remind me of how much I miss every detail of single encounters, even those framed in a a 5 hours box. It aches loving tiny pieces of memories, and you seem to bring that in me. Being completely honest, I've been a junkie for infatuations for too long, but now I'm just not sure if I have the energy to start a new one. There's so much fear and low expectations that might be interfering with these signals you try to send my way. It seems that you might have a plan, and my smashed ego appreciates that, it truly does. These words go out to you because it could be easier to just break the magic before it begins, just as long as my body continues to move towards you, we'll have to figure it out in total darkness. My heart is so hungry that might just eat anything that passes by. Lyrics by Imagine Dragons When the days are cold And the cards all fold And the saints we see Are all made of gold When your dreams all fail And the ones we hail Are the worst of all And the blood's run stale I want to hide the truth I want to shelter you But with the beast inside There's nowhere we can hide No matter what we breed We still are made of greed This is my kingdom come This is my kingdom come When you feel my heat Look into my eyes It's where my demons hide It's where my demons hide Don't get too close It's dark inside It's where my demons hide It's where my demons hide When the curtain's call Is the last of all When the lights fade out All the sinners crawl So they dug your grave And the masquerade Will come calling out At the mess you made Don't want to let you down But I am hell bound Though this is all for you Don't want to hide the truth No matter what we breed We still are made of greed This is my kingdom come This is my kingdom come
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