Fraction

0 voices

Like forgeting there's a destiny to reach
A place where I must arrive
A road that requires my presence
Lights that remind me there's a time that eats me alive


For a fraction of time a smile protects me
Like if the sun would dare just for an instance
to freeze and stare
Making this particular second eternal
And becoming a perfect partner to me


My head and fingers don't notice
the sequence of blues going around this window
I'm making time stop, just for a fraction of time


...and before it ends
...before my power releases
the glory of stillness will keep me warm
and will remind me of the expecting of nothing


In the photo:
Rosana Goerke
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Solution For One Tiny Moment

0 voices


If I close me eyes this way
If I press myself down to this ground
If I let my hair cover any sign of life around
Then the sound will vanish

If I hold on to my feet
If I get my muscles this tense and tight
If I seal my lips like this
Then your image will disappear

If I cross my fingers
If I arch my back this way
If I wrinkle my mind as much as I can
Then for just the time I can do all this...

... you're not real.
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Noticed

0 voices


Maybe I wish I felt different about this, but there's always one truth within all in our mind states. I heard this song, and after certain amounts of re-plays an idea came to my head: Today I don't believe what the lyrics say, at least not tonight, I never know about tomorrow.

There is a bunch of endings and beginnings in life, they all differ in many circunstancial points, and they happen with no control over time. I never know when moments like that can come and surprise me, or when they can do it again and just vanish. But they do, and in some more than in others I try to avoid the warning signs, just to test myself.

The heart can never beat the same way with different people, I wish I believed in that true beating or the one that will make the other ones get smaller, or make me forget their sound within time... Maybe this perspective of mine will change in the future, maybe I hope for it, but for now I enjoy the fact that I don't... because it means that I've been able to assume some endings, just to explore these nice beginnings.

I do believe in the sensations of what 'new' means... I do believe in the blindness by choice because the feeling and infatuation demands a smile for no reasonable reason... I do believe in the feeling after feeling, all kinds of good and bad sensations, because it means that the heart works, and I can always feel again.

Lyrics by Mutemath

Careful when you open
It's easy to be broken
In the strangest fashion
You start a chain reaction
When you look my way
Something's pounding away
And I wonder if I ever
felt this before

And all this time, oblivious
to what you make so obvious
I can't believe I never noticed my heart before

And you are reaching
Something that is beating
I can't believe I never noticed my heart before
Over and again
Racing out of my skin
I can't believe I never noticed my heart before
At least it was never until I noticed

you and your ways
Capture what I've misplaced
In the perfect fashion
Just watch my heart's reaction
This point of view
is nothing that I'm used to, but I
won't close my eyes
'Cause they're on to you

And all this time,
it was staring me blind
I can't believe I never noticed my heart before

And you are reaching
Something that is beating
I can't believe I never noticed my heart before
Over and again
Racing out of my skin
I can't believe I never noticed my heart before
At least it was never until I noticed

you

The only time I ever noticed my heart
Was when I noticed you, yeah
The only time I ever noticed my heart
Was when I noticed you, yeah
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Parachute

0 voices


In a blink you were here, like if the sky had decided to be kind enough
kind enough to open up and bring this energy to me

Like if the air that brought you could easily take you away
and even with you around, I didn't notice the breeze that surounded you
back then, you were just around

But then this air that once was good to me, took you away
with or without your help I saw how you parachute flew
away from my celling, away from me

I look back and it seems so fast
now when they ask about you my face tries hard to hide
hide this emotion
and the sadness of the lack of who you were

In a blink you were here, like if the sky had dediced to be kind enough
but not kind enough to let you stick for a little while
not kind enough to show you how wrong it is for me that you're not here anymore.

This song reminds me of it... is a short song
as short as the time that took the sky to take you away again.

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Tease

0 voices


How good could it be?
Are there rules for it?
Do I like it better than the real deal?
Is it fake?
What's the point?
Is it natural in me to do so?
Do I hurt anyone with it?
Is there a limit that I understand?

All these questions come to my head... often
Sometimes I answer them, sometimes I smile inside
There are moments when I stop and then go on
All I know is that as fun as it can get... They could hang me for it.

* The teaser in the photo... Wal.  *
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When The Party Ends

0 voices


We clean up, see the room after the people leave
Usually there's a lot to fix, arrange
Pick up, move again 

The mind full of certain moments that came real during the night
Memories that get shaped while organizing
Things I wish I said
Some others I wish I didn't do

Drinking the last bottle of wine
while the loud music bounces on the walls
in this now empty space
without you

I don't wanna take off my clothes
or remove my makeup...
This idea of having you close just for the night ended too fast
too quickly...

After the party ends I'll just sit here
look around with my glass of wine
and think of another and new excuse to have you over.
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Around This 443

0 voices


443 could be just a number, but this time it's the amount of entries I've written in this blog.. This blog that got created 5 years ago, with a bunch of undisciplined ideas and a lack of structure, but one that has become a mirror, sheild and weapon to me and all my decisions (not sure if that's a good thing or not yet)... Still hiding behind this name and this character.

Reviewing sometimes the perspectives I own and take as mine, defining others and making an effort to adjust to the idea of deleting and erasing; I've written many words put together, with sounds that remind me of how mine these lines are, and touching other people with it.

443 sounds like a small number if I think about what I might be missing still, but when I think about the amount of times I've tried to reach a certain goal with each and every entry, then the number feels too big...

I don't know if this is the right path, or if all my decisions have been the correct ones, but I'm sure about how it feels, the writing and the exposing of the soul, with all I've got and all that defines me, a colorfull mixed of truths and lies, all shared with the best of intentions.

Happy Birthday Box. 

Photo by Luz
Lyrics of a song that I'm digging, by Keane

I didn't want to go
Go back and look for you
But it's a heartless drug
I'm addicted to

And when I drive that road
And start to feel that chill
I think I see your face
Do you come here still?

Those were the times and these were the places
Your love was so good
And now that I'm here, I suddenly find that I'm tumbling backwards

I'm back to where I was before
Dreaming of glory and your love
And now I'm lying on your floor
Crashed on the surface of your love

The chemicals react
And molecules collide
The poison works its way
Somewhere down inside

When we were young I really believed
Love would never leave us
But time has a knack of pulling the rug out
From underneath us

And nothing matters anymore
I'm still a victim of your love
And now I'm banging on your door
Tumbling backwards with your love
Over and over in your love

I know they're only ghosts
And memories that I'm clutching at
Maybe I'm reaching back
For something I never had
Still it seems so real to me
These rock and threats
That lead me back to you

I'm back to where I was before
Tumbling backwards at your love
And now I'm lying on your floor
Crashed on the surface of your love
and the other dreams we had
Fractioned and frozen with your love

You put a spell upon me there
Never be broken in your love
Nowhere to run to but your love
Over and over in your love
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Unarmed

2 voices


If I could grab this sensations and hold on to them for all eternity, then our lives would be so different, maybe happier, maybe insane, but if I could make them last... If I just could.

There's nothing between the world and my heart, at this point there's not much I can do, adjust, measure, avoid, protect, there's just a naked soul with vulnerable feelings exposed in this environment of falls and pain. Because if we could only feel the good things, then I wouldn't be so afraid.

Behind me there's my history, side by side I walk with what I own, and in front only what faith will provide. There's nothing but who I am and what I feel... Because I know moments can't freeze and seconds of greatness will just last what they're supposed to.

If I could move with all this ideas, grab the unknown future and hide it in my drawer, then I think this fear would get smaller, at least just a bit. But I will still walk towards that experience, leaving under my bed all my weapons of control, the ones I use to shape this situations... They will stay here, while I move forward.

If I could grab this sensations and hold on to them for all eternity, then our lives would be so different, maybe happier, maybe insane, but if I could make them last... If I just could.

In the photo: Ruth
Lyrics by Metric

Get hot, get too close to the flame
Wild, open space
Talk like an open book
Sign me up
Got no time to take a picture
I'll remember someday all the chances we took
We're so close to something better left unknown
We're so close to something better left unknown

I can feel it in my bones
Gimme sympathy
After all of this is gone
Who'd you rather be?
The Beatles or the Rolling Stones?
Oh, seriously
You're gonna make mistakes, you're young
Come on, baby, play me something
Like, "Here Comes the Sun"
Come on, baby, play me something
Like, "Here Comes the Sun"

Don't go, stay with the all-unknown
Stay away from the hooks
All the chances we took
We're so close to something better left unknown
We're so close to something better left unknown

I can feel it in my bones
Gimme sympathy
After all of this is gone
Who'd you rather be?
The Beatles or the Rolling Stones?
Oh, seriously
You're gonna make mistakes, you're young
Come on, baby, play me something
Like, "Here Comes the Sun"
Read On